Written by Putra Muskita
Sad news, everyone. Our beloved finance minister Sri Mulyani Indrawati, one of the few decent people left in the decrepit dungeon that is the Indonesian government, has decided to pack her bags and leave Indonesia to take up the position of Managing Director at the World Bank. Who wouldn’t want to take up that job offer? Not only does she get three billion rupiahs a year, she can escape from her fellow legislators and their embarrassing temper tantrums (broadcasted on international television to allow further humiliation during Ethics 101) and increasingly unrealistic demands (you don’t expect government officials to ride cars that are priced below 1.3 billion rupiah now, do you? What do you think they are? Common representatives of the people?). As much as we’d like to wish #SMI, our favourite twitter moniker the best of luck, (she beat Bieber on the trending topics, an achievement in itself) there is one tiny little problem with her absence.
Our country is doomed. Which means we are, too.
She was probably the best thing that ever happened to our corruption-plagued, crisis-ridden country. To quote Forbes, who ranked her #23 in their annual ranking of the Top 100 Most Powerful Women, SMI has helped Indonesia reach an all-time high of $50 billion in foreign exchange reserves and attract significant foreign investment. More importantly, she has fought against corruption - with real results! - created tax incentives, and simplified investment laws. If you don’t understand economic jargon, basically they’re good things. Very good things.
So what will now happen to Indonesia? And, more importantly, to us Indonesians? Three things.
1. Feel constantly inferior among Singaporeans.
Indonesia has consistently achieved a corruption index of lower than 3.0, according to Transparency International, which is not that bad: we’re 111th out of 180 countries! Hey, at least we’re not 180th. We’re still better than Cambodia (famous for ancient Buddhist temples; Pol Pot, the guy who killed 2.5 million people; and marijuana-flavored pizza) and Myanmar (famous for being a perpetual American enemy; the continual house arrest of Aung San Suu Kyi; and for being the Most Corrupt Country in the Asia Pacific). Are we better than Singapore? Well, just like our transportation system and GDP per capita, the answer is no.
The problem is, SMI actually improved our ranking. We used to score below 2.5, and now we’re somewhere between 2.5 and 3.0. She eliminated the corrupt tax and customs officials, and became the apparent face of anticorruption in Indonesia. So now that she’s gone, how can we ever face our Singaporean friends again?! I don’t know.
2. Realize just how unfair life really is.
Aburizal “Ical” Bakrie is SMI’s archenemy, allegedly after she refused to close down the stock markets when the prices of one of his companies fell. Which is understandable, of course; how else is he going to pay for his son Ardi’s 10 billion rupiah wedding to Nia Ramadhani help the 100 million-odd Indonesians who live under the poverty line? And then there’s the case where his associates are suspected of tax evasion. No matter how altruistic Ical’s motives are, SMI is indirectly hurting his bottom line! And we don’t want that! Just ask the Lapindo people. So with SMI leaving, we’ll definitely see more ridiculously unaffordable high society weddings like this one…
and be reminded of how unfair the world really is. The atrocity of it all!
3. Become a case study.
I believe we have heard enough about Indonesia during numerous classes, and generally, they’re all case studies. Case studies that start with: “How Not To”. Like, “How Not To Fall into a Deep Economic Crisis While Simultaneously Experiencing A Banking Crisis, Like Indonesia.” It doesn’t really put us in a good position because you can feel everyone staring at you while your professor talks about the decaying hell-hole that is your country. It’s really awkward because you don’t really know where and how to look as you silently curse the previous governments for passing on shame and deep structural mistakes for us to inherit. Should you pretend to be patriotic, or should you fall victim to peer pressure and condemn your own country? Your own country!
And now that SMI is leaving, the next time you come into Economics class, they’ll be talking about “How Not To Lose Your Finance Minister To The World Bank”. Anyway, sure, SMI leaving may leave some good for our country though her departure is still huge loss.
Indonesia will get over it.
We always do, right?
